Gandhijee Fourth Monkey

Could u fax me ur photo very very urgently ? Mind u - really very very urgent, damn serious and very imp.....
I'm playing cards andwe've misplaced the JOKER.


from Mon to Sun, From Jan To Dec,
From birth till my death,
my feelings 4 u have never changed.
For me, you've always been
..........a headache!


U & ME laughing,
U & ME crying,
U & ME dreaming,
U & ME holding on,
U & ME...
just U & ME sitting in a MENTAL HOSPITAL & ME CHECKING U. >

Falling in love is a sweet ambition,
finding true love is a life time mission..
Take my word, follow the Indian tradition
& marry ur dad's decision !

cannot hide this from u any more.
I don't want 2 hurt u
and I feel it's best if I tell u,
before you hear it from someone else ...........
Potato Prices Have Gone Up !

Maine poochha chand se
"dekha hai kahin mere yaar sa hasin",
Chand ne kaha
"Abey, itni upar se dikhta hai kya".

Good looks catch the eyes,
but good Personality catches the heart.
You are blessed with both!
FLATTERED???
Don't Be!!! It was sent to ME, and I just wanted you to read it...

Woh chum le ek bar, to aati nahi neend,
unki meethi awaaz mein hee, raat jaati hai beet,
isliye kehta hoon yaaro,
kachhua jalao machchar bhagao

It's funny when people discuss LOVE MARRIAGE vs ARRANGED. It's like asking
someone, if suicide is better or being murdered.

sunsaan sadak ke paas ke sukhe hue peepal ki tuti hui tehni ke murjhaye hue patte par baithe hue bhoot ke pair(leg) se nikalte hue khoon ke bimar bacteria, how r u?

Saas saw her bahu sleeping with other man, but she didn't tell her son because,
"saas bhi kabhi bahu thi"

Ek admi sadhu se bola, meri biwi bahut pareshan karti hai, koi upay batao.
sadhu bola, saale upaay hota to mai sadhu kyun banta?

What's the similarity between MOBILE and MARRIAGE - In both case you
feel "aur thoda ruk jaata to accha model milta"

Bhagwan ko gussa kab aata hai? jab koi ladki shadi se pehle pregnant ho,
uski maa bole "HEY BHAGWAN YE TUNE KYA KIYA?".

A sardar lost his donkey, but still he was dancing, someone asked him y r u dancing?
sardar said achha hua main gadhe pe nahi baita tha varna main bhi kho jata.

A first-grade teacher, Ms Brooks was having trouble
with one of her students. The teacher asked, "Tom
what is your problem?"

Tom answered, "I'm too smart for the first Grade.
My sister is in the third grade and I'm smarter than
she is! I think I should be in the third-grade too!"

Ms Brooks had enough. She took Tom to the
principal's office.

While Tom waited in the outer office, the teacher
explained to the principal what the situation was.

The principal told Ms Brooks he would give the boy a
test and if he failed to answer any of his questions
he was to go back to the first grade and behave.

She agreed. Tom was brought in and the conditions
were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"

Tom: "9".

Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"

Tom: "36".

And so it went with every question the principal
thought a third-grade should know.The principal looks
at Ms Brooks and tells her, "I think Tom can go to
the third-grade."

Ms Brooks says to the principal, "Let me ask him some
questions?"

The principal and Tom both agree.

Ms Brooks asks, "What does a cow have four of that I
have only two of?

Tom, after a moment "Legs."

Ms Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I
do not have?"

Tom: "Pockets."
Ms Brooks: What starts with a C and ends with a T is
hairy,oval,and delicious and contains thin whitish
liquid?

Tom: Coconut

Ms Brooks: What goes in hard and pink then comes out
soft and sticky?

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he
could stop the answer,But Tom was taking charge.

Tom: Bubblegum

Ms Brooks: What does a man do standing up, a woman
does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he
could stop the answer...

Tom: Shake hands.

Ms Brooks: Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of
questions, okay?

Ms Brooks: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me
down to get me up.I get wet before you do.

Tom: Tent.

Ms Brooks: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me
when you're bored. The best man always has me first.

The Principal was looking restless and a bit tense.

Tom: Wedding Ring.

Ms Brooks: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I
drip. When you blow me, you feel good.

Tom: Nose.

Ms Brooks: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I
come with a quiver.

Tom: Arrow.

Ms Brooks: What word starts with 'F' and ends in 'K'
that means a lot of heat and excitement?

Tom: Fire truck.

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to
the teacher,"Send Tom to University, I got the last
ten questions wrong myself!"

A Bihari hat-seller who was passing by a forest decided to take a nap under one of the trees, so he left his whole basket of hats by the side.
A few hours later, he woke up and realized that all his hats were gone. He looked up and to his surprise, the tree was full of monkeys and they had taken all his hats. The Bihari sits down and thinks of how he can get the hats down.
While thinking he started to scratch his head. The next moment, the monkeys were doing the same. Next, he took down his own hat, the monkeys did exactly the same. An idea came to him, he took his hat and threw it on the floor and the monkeys did that too. So he finally managed to get all his hats back.
Fifty years later, his grandson, Laloo, also became a hat-seller and had heard this monkey story from his grandfather. One day, just like his grandfather, he passed by the same forest. It was very hot, and he took a nap under the same tree and left the hats on the floor. He woke up and
realized that all his hats were taken by the monkeys on the tree. He remembered his grand father's words, started scratching his head and the monkeys followed. He took down his hat and fanned himself and again the monkeys followed. Now, very convinced of his grandfather's idea, Laloo threw his hat on the floor but to his surprise, the monkeys still held on to all the hats. Then one monkey climbed down the tree, grabbed the hat on the floor, gave him a slap and said
"You think only you have a grandfather?"

After the student delivered the pizza to old Ken's house, Ken asked,
"What is the usual tip?"

"Well," replied the youth, "this is my first trip here, but the other
guys say if I get 5 cents out of you, I'll be doing great."

"Is that so?" snorted Ken. "Well, just to show them how wrong they
are, here's five bucks."

"Thanks," replied the youth, "I'll put this towards my studies."

"What are you studying?" asked Ken.

The lad smiles and said: "Applied Psychology."

A housewife takes a lover during the day, while her husband is at work. Unbeknownst to her, her 9 year old son was hiding in the closet. Her husband came home unexpectedly, so she hid her lover in the closet. The boy now has company.

Boy: "Dark in here."
Man: "Yes it is."
Boy: "I have a baseball."
Man: "That's nice."
Boy: "Want to buy it?"
Man: "No, thanks."
Boy: "My dad's outside."
Man: "OK, how much?"
Boy: "$250."

In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the mom's lover are in the closet together.

Boy: "Dark in here."
Man: "Yes, it is."
Boy: "I have a baseball glove."
Man: "How much?"
Boy: "$750."
Man: "Fine."

A few days later, the father says to the boy, "Grab your glove. Let's go outside and toss the baseball!"

The boy says, "I can't. I sold them."

The father asks, "How much did you sell them for?"

The son says, "$1,000."

The father says, "That's terrible to overcharge your friends like that.
That is way more than those two things cost. I'm going to take you to church and make you confess."

They go to church and the father alerts the priest and makes the little boy sit in the confession booth and closes the door.

The boy says, "Dark in here."

The priest says, "Don't start that shit again."